Posts Tagged ‘just wrong’

Hello, My Name is Íñigo Narwhal..

Wednesday, October 13th, 2010

This is officially the most awesome toy based on any sea life ever! We had always imagined the narwhal would be a bad-ass if it decided to exact revenge upon the rest of the world, but we never considered immortalizing the concept in plastic. Luckily, someone else did! And does cuteness provide a defense against the narwhal’s anger? No! Take that, baby seal, and penguin, and.. koala bear?? That’s one overdeveloped sense of vengeance (and a long swim).

Eat Out More Often

Thursday, September 23rd, 2010

Thankfully this is a commemorative plate for decorative purposes only. The last thing you’d want a plate dedicated to this Gore Vidal-penned, Bob Guccione-produced semi-mainstream porn film to do is touch your food. Still, it’s an attractive and statement-making set of crockery. This plate depicts Caligula’s entrance to the orgy. We hope to find the others as time goes on. Check your attics and basements, people! This titillating tribute was discovered at Otto’s Antiques in Hempstead, TX.

Shaggy and Scooby I could understand, but..

Wednesday, September 15th, 2010

Reality trumps fiction once again! Just when you thought real toys couldn’t get any weirder, along comes this. Iconic cartoon characters suckin’ on tar sticks!? Blasphemy, but true!! Even though these cheap knock-off toys are unlicensed, they bear a perfect resemblance to our Hannah Barbera favorites. Actually, according to the contents of those little cigarettes, it might explain why Huckleberry Hound was so laid back and why Yogi Bear was always hungry. I wonder..

It’s Not For FaceTime..

Saturday, September 11th, 2010

Ernest Walton and John Cockroft didn’t even dream of blowing up two major cities in Japan when they split the atom, and I’m sure that Andrey Ternovskiy didn’t intend for his own creation to turn into a 24 hour a day sausage fest either. But, the cat’s out of the bag. This magazine ad obviously intends to cash in on the roulette style chat phenomenon by allowing guys to do what they do on these sites while on the go. Pretty handy, don’t you think? Found in a trash bin at the Villa Coffee House in Saddle Rock, NY.

Epic Toy Weirdness

Wednesday, September 8th, 2010

Dear, oh dear, where to begin. First, let me assure you this is a real toy, despite the fact it’s a big bowl of wrong any way you look at it. Is it that the word “Pedo” is in the name, or that the cartoon boy on the package looks like he’s being attacked by one? Even more obvious is the shape and color scheme of the toy itself. Do we even need to go there? I don’t think so. Surprisingly, similar toys with the same name are out there (but in much less disturbing designs). FYI: Yes, we did notice the “action lines” in the illustration that make it look like it’s vibrating. We decided not go there either.

No Worries! He’s Already Dead.

Monday, September 6th, 2010

One might think this variation on a classic would be easier since the welfare of the “patient” isn’t an issue. But, the challenge lies in getting the internal organs out without damaging them (ie. touching the sides) to determine the cause of death. Morbid future-forensic scientists could really get a kick out of dissecting someone who’s kicked. They really missed the boat by not licensing the television show Quincy, M.E. but apparently it was tied up at the time with toys like this one. Found at Reif’s Hardware in Boyette, FL.

Biohazard? More Like Bio-Licious!

Wednesday, September 1st, 2010

Here’s a real item for which the manufacturer caught some serious flack. A Jurassic Park lunchbox? Innocent enough.. Until you see the Thermos! If they had made that biohazard label a little more cheesy and a little less ominous and realistic, maybe it would have had less chance of encouraging kids to dig around for snacks in the sharps container the next time they visit the clinic. For added effect, why not put your sandwiches in matching “specimen bags”? This piece is a part of the official Evil Meatball Vs Cat! collection.

We’re No. 1 (and No. 2)!

Wednesday, August 18th, 2010

Leave it to the Swedish to embody bodily functions in cute plush fashion. This modern (and very real) example of toy weirdness rates seriously high on the bizarro scale. What would one possibly do with these? Take a leak? Where would you take it? Maybe you could drop the other one off at the pool? Total wackiness.

(We originally made a mistake on the country of origin, thanks NR!)

On the Fritz

Monday, August 9th, 2010

Back in the day, most adults thought cartoons were for kids, but this one changed all that. Ralph Bakshi’s film based on Robert Crumb’s irreverent characters was the first animated film to garner an “X” rating. And, while Fritz was bouncing from bed to bed on screen, kids almost had the chance to bounce around on Fritz! Luckily this hopping bouncy toy never made it beyond the prototype stage. This one of a kind piece is part of a private collection housed in Reno, NV.

One to Phone Home About

Wednesday, August 4th, 2010

Yes, this is real, for I indeed had one myself. While most of us simply enjoyed flipping each other the extra-terrestrial bird with it, it’s obvious now that there were other possibilities unbeknownst to our fragile, innocent minds at the time. Once again, the product approval process fails spectacularly! BTW, this isn’t the first time we’ve reported on a phallic finger.