Posts Tagged ‘just wrong’

Epic Toy Weirdness

Wednesday, September 8th, 2010

Dear, oh dear, where to begin. First, let me assure you this is a real toy, despite the fact it’s a big bowl of wrong any way you look at it. Is it that the word “Pedo” is in the name, or that the cartoon boy on the package looks like he’s being attacked by one? Even more obvious is the shape and color scheme of the toy itself. Do we even need to go there? I don’t think so. Surprisingly, similar toys with the same name are out there (but in much less disturbing designs). FYI: Yes, we did notice the “action lines” in the illustration that make it look like it’s vibrating. We decided not go there either.

No Worries! He’s Already Dead.

Monday, September 6th, 2010

One might think this variation on a classic would be easier since the welfare of the “patient” isn’t an issue. But, the challenge lies in getting the internal organs out without damaging them (ie. touching the sides) to determine the cause of death. Morbid future-forensic scientists could really get a kick out of dissecting someone who’s kicked. They really missed the boat by not licensing the television show Quincy, M.E. but apparently it was tied up at the time with toys like this one. Found at Reif’s Hardware in Boyette, FL.

Biohazard? More Like Bio-Licious!

Wednesday, September 1st, 2010

Here’s a real item for which the manufacturer caught some serious flack. A Jurassic Park lunchbox? Innocent enough.. Until you see the Thermos! If they had made that biohazard label a little more cheesy and a little less ominous and realistic, maybe it would have had less chance of encouraging kids to dig around for snacks in the sharps container the next time they visit the clinic. For added effect, why not put your sandwiches in matching “specimen bags”? This piece is a part of the official Evil Meatball Vs Cat! collection.

We’re No. 1 (and No. 2)!

Wednesday, August 18th, 2010

Leave it to the Swedish to embody bodily functions in cute plush fashion. This modern (and very real) example of toy weirdness rates seriously high on the bizarro scale. What would one possibly do with these? Take a leak? Where would you take it? Maybe you could drop the other one off at the pool? Total wackiness.

(We originally made a mistake on the country of origin, thanks NR!)

On the Fritz

Monday, August 9th, 2010

Back in the day, most adults thought cartoons were for kids, but this one changed all that. Ralph Bakshi’s film based on Robert Crumb’s irreverent characters was the first animated film to garner an “X” rating. And, while Fritz was bouncing from bed to bed on screen, kids almost had the chance to bounce around on Fritz! Luckily this hopping bouncy toy never made it beyond the prototype stage. This one of a kind piece is part of a private collection housed in Reno, NV.

One to Phone Home About

Wednesday, August 4th, 2010

Yes, this is real, for I indeed had one myself. While most of us simply enjoyed flipping each other the extra-terrestrial bird with it, it’s obvious now that there were other possibilities unbeknownst to our fragile, innocent minds at the time. Once again, the product approval process fails spectacularly! BTW, this isn’t the first time we’ve reported on a phallic finger.

For Preschool Carnivores..

Friday, July 23rd, 2010

They could have called this an “Eat ‘n Say”! Nonetheless, it’s important for youngsters to learn where delicious meats come from, and this toy was their ticket to knowledge. Just point the arrow and pull the string.. Well, actually, we don’t know what sounds it made, as this one is broken. Was it the sound of a sizzling grill, the grinding of a meat saw through bones, or just the sounds of the animals meeting their demise at the slaughterhouse? Whichever it is, if you’re still hungry after learning the truth about meat, then congratulations! You’re officially a carnivore. And yes, we noticed they left out venison. Found at the Stop ‘n Swap Flea Market in Yuma, AZ.

So, what are you wearing? Saddle Oxfords? Hot.

Wednesday, July 21st, 2010


click image for larger version

I love educational toys that teach kids skills which can lead to gainful employment. With this playset young ladies could learn a job that’s been around almost as long as telephones, and has turned into a million dollar industry. Isn’t capitalism great? Found at the Goodspirit Donation Center in Silverton, OR.

I’ll Never Eat Turkey Breast Again

Monday, July 19th, 2010

We don’t usually journey into reality on a Monday, but this real kitchen item just had to be acknowledged. It actually looks pretty useful, and since it actually “hooks” a turkey, even the title is a very logical and acceptable pun. But, the image it conjures should have been left to the imagination. Perhaps they could advertise the package as being a diet aid as well. It sure killed my appetite.

You’re Asking For it, Little Mister!

Friday, July 9th, 2010

It’s a terrible paradox: kids love to make noise, while adults find it unbearably annoying to the point of pulling out one’s own hair. This Little Goldie Book teaches kids about understanding when mommy and daddy have had it “up to here” and just need to sit down with a martini and relax. Childhood sure can be confusing! Found at Addy’s Pawn in Lockwood, MT.